I haven't written in a long time. This season of life for me, has at times slapped me speechless. It has been a season of prayer and thinking, talking and just a smidgen of writing. It is often difficult for me to write when my mind is full and my heart is heavy. The simple act of writing at those times often overwhelms me. I find that the pen cannot handle my heart and the paper will not be able to withstand the weight of the words. I want to get past this... I want to write during these times... I want to pour my heart onto the paper... and trust that it can contain the whole of what I am feeling.
My habit during these times is often to pour it all out to God. I know his hands can contain all that I pour into them and his heart can handle my garbled emotions. I also know he can respond to my hearts cry and bring comfort to my heartache. I have benefited many times from talking to my husband, close friends and family about the issues of my heart, and I have been thankful for the love and listening and wise counsel they have given me. I need people in my life that can offer me heart compassion and comfort, but at the end of the day it's only Jesus that can fully bear my burden. His capacity is great, and He not only receives my pouring out, but he give me beauty for ashes, faith for fear, gladness for mourning, peace for despair. And... He promises me his love... always consistent, always unconditional, always filled with mountains of grace. Yes, He offers his correction too, but it comes with restoration and baskets of forgiveness for my sinful-redeemed soul.
God truly is an ever present help in times of need, and a friend that sticks closer than a brother. He knows me and I need that sometimes. I need the one who can translate my sighs and not take offense to my emotional garbling. I have been blessed in countless ways, but the primo blessing is the steadfast, fresh, everlasting love and grace of God. It changes, challenges and sustains me in the weariest of seasons and in the highs of life. May you be encouraged today in God's steadfast love for you. He knows you. You can't surprise or shock him. Pour out your heart to the counselor of counselors and receive his grace and love in abundance.
And Then She Spoke
She often betrays her own heart
when the words lined up in her flesh find the back door to her mouth
they scurry off her tongue like a dash of thunder
she's heard it said, she's read it herself
"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks"
not one to argue with the Holy Word, Yet she finds herself wanting to object to the passage
Abundance of my heart? What abounds in her heart these days?
She's had season's of sweetness, Words so light they danced with joy out of her heart off of her ribcage, and with joy and great airiness floated their way to her tongue, cascading out of her mouth like a treasured waterfall
and there have been times that the sweet words fell on bitter ears and returned to her broken and wearied
She's had seasons of words so rough they scratch her throat, fighting each other to get out only to fall out jumbled and messy, soaked in tears. Sometimes falling on deaf ears that couldn't handle the mangled mess of letters
Words disguised as anger, words clothed in wrath, yet filled with pain and discontent never having the courage to speak on their own, wrapped only in their true garment of pain
She's had seasons of words and thoughts that never found their way to her mouth
words with roots so deep, words that seeped through her soul into her fingers
only to be seen on recycled trees, penned in blue ink
She's had seasons of words that bruised her heart coming up from her gut with murmurs and groaning so cavernous only her Creator could decipher their meaning
She's had seasons of words and they have blessed her, broken her, nourished her, condemned her and freed her
and in all these seasons, in all these words and writings and groaning
I guess...
her heart spoke
maybe not always in gentleness and peace
maybe not always with seamless words or cascading grace
but she opened her mouth and out of it her heart dealt its cards
"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks"
it's true, it does
she searched her heart... and then she spoke
it was necessary
it was broken
it was beautiful
it was covered by God's grace
My habit during these times is often to pour it all out to God. I know his hands can contain all that I pour into them and his heart can handle my garbled emotions. I also know he can respond to my hearts cry and bring comfort to my heartache. I have benefited many times from talking to my husband, close friends and family about the issues of my heart, and I have been thankful for the love and listening and wise counsel they have given me. I need people in my life that can offer me heart compassion and comfort, but at the end of the day it's only Jesus that can fully bear my burden. His capacity is great, and He not only receives my pouring out, but he give me beauty for ashes, faith for fear, gladness for mourning, peace for despair. And... He promises me his love... always consistent, always unconditional, always filled with mountains of grace. Yes, He offers his correction too, but it comes with restoration and baskets of forgiveness for my sinful-redeemed soul.
God truly is an ever present help in times of need, and a friend that sticks closer than a brother. He knows me and I need that sometimes. I need the one who can translate my sighs and not take offense to my emotional garbling. I have been blessed in countless ways, but the primo blessing is the steadfast, fresh, everlasting love and grace of God. It changes, challenges and sustains me in the weariest of seasons and in the highs of life. May you be encouraged today in God's steadfast love for you. He knows you. You can't surprise or shock him. Pour out your heart to the counselor of counselors and receive his grace and love in abundance.
And Then She Spoke
She often betrays her own heart
when the words lined up in her flesh find the back door to her mouth
they scurry off her tongue like a dash of thunder
she's heard it said, she's read it herself
"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks"
not one to argue with the Holy Word, Yet she finds herself wanting to object to the passage
Abundance of my heart? What abounds in her heart these days?
She's had season's of sweetness, Words so light they danced with joy out of her heart off of her ribcage, and with joy and great airiness floated their way to her tongue, cascading out of her mouth like a treasured waterfall
and there have been times that the sweet words fell on bitter ears and returned to her broken and wearied
She's had seasons of words so rough they scratch her throat, fighting each other to get out only to fall out jumbled and messy, soaked in tears. Sometimes falling on deaf ears that couldn't handle the mangled mess of letters
Words disguised as anger, words clothed in wrath, yet filled with pain and discontent never having the courage to speak on their own, wrapped only in their true garment of pain
She's had seasons of words and thoughts that never found their way to her mouth
words with roots so deep, words that seeped through her soul into her fingers
only to be seen on recycled trees, penned in blue ink
She's had seasons of words that bruised her heart coming up from her gut with murmurs and groaning so cavernous only her Creator could decipher their meaning
She's had seasons of words and they have blessed her, broken her, nourished her, condemned her and freed her
and in all these seasons, in all these words and writings and groaning
I guess...
her heart spoke
maybe not always in gentleness and peace
maybe not always with seamless words or cascading grace
but she opened her mouth and out of it her heart dealt its cards
"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks"
it's true, it does
she searched her heart... and then she spoke
it was necessary
it was broken
it was beautiful
it was covered by God's grace
